Friday, 10 January 2014

Political ad-wise

The author of this blog for unknown reasons has suddenly disappeared from the social circle. He was last spotted in the Burmese jungles where the monkeys had given him a political asylum.

Advice To:


Your name sounds Macedonian.
Nevertheless, dude, I just don't have any advice for you. you've fallen to such a low category! First of all, it has been really hard as to what to identify you as. Are you a politician? Or a businessman? Or just a mama's boy trying to fiddle at her workplace? What are you seriously? The nation wants to know!
You came in on a high note. Being branded as the pall bearer of change for modern India. You looked highly intelligent, qualified and there was a time when you were the most sought after bachelor outweighing even Dhoni's popularity when he was single! Now, I doubt whether girls perceive you as a transgender or as a pothead. Recently, Poonam Pandey was asked if she was willing to date you. She retorted at the reporter with a fiery vengeance and shouted Mahatma Gandhi's slogans at him.
Rahul, dude, what has happened to your fashion sense? Take a bath atleast someday! And we know you're an addict but why show it in public? Coming to these media conferences fully stoned and blown out of your mind, what was that all about? You talk about things that even you yourself don't know about, make yourself a laughing stock at your rallies and above all that troll your own partymen? And stop being a mama's boy for once. If other party's policies are fancier than yours, why do you have to make such a hue and cry over it? Grow up dude, grow up!
Finally, I am getting to some serious advice here- Go UNDERGROUND for atleast next 4 years. Just get the hell out of public domain ! You must've seen Hancock? (I think it's A-rated so not in the theatres but pirated?) Same principle. You wait for people to miss you. Hope for Modi to fail or decline in his popularity all of a sudden and comeback in a new Avatar in 2018. Start gearing up for 2019 elections and this time be a good boy and remember your speeches by heart.
And for god's sake. if there is any piece of intelligence left in you, don't contest these 2014 elections! Don't get yourself nominated as the party's PM candidate. It'll only add to your misery and congress's mockery.


Sir, heartiest congratulations for being selected as party's PM candidate. But what have you done? You rolled out the carpet for AAP in Delhi ! This just shows that people do not really like you. They'll vote for any dickhead who raises his voice against corruption. (*AK's not a Dickhead)
You were the major force behind driving in the country the anti-corruption, anti-congress wave. You were perceived as the ray of hope, a person who would eradicate corruption and do something real for common man. The light of change that you were, have let someone else bask in your glory. You are flawless. But your partymen aren't. They are leaving no stone upturned to create as many hurdles in  your way as possible. Anointment of Yedyurappa, weird statements from your party ministers especially Rajnath singh and RSS pulling up bizarre policies every now and then, you really have a tough time ahead. Mr. Advani lamenting on your success isn't a good sign either.
So, it's finally time to let your horses loose and put everything you have on stake. More time you wait for the arrival of the right time to start your campaigning, more hiccups will be created by the regional parties. And like AAP, they will eat your votebank. So, it's high time to let NaMo roar as loudly as possible. The NaMo decibel should silence all other parties. This thunder should be heard in each and every corner of the country.


Is he still alive? O_O
It is worth mentioning here that the author of this blog doesn't give a shit about Raj Thackery. His only appearance here is because of the little news headline he grabbed this morning by calling his party, "The BAAP of AAP". Someone is finally accepting his true age.
The only advice to him that the author of this blog can give is - stop dyeing your hair man! You look ridiculous!


You, sir, turned out to be even a bigger motherfucker than your father, didn't you? Well, no advice for you either, for we all need an example for ourselves of how not to raise a fucked up child. Although we do have Rahul as a serious contender for this category. Anyways,we, the educated ones, also need you to continue on your political path because frankly, we do need a gentle reminder that dirty politics by congress is not so dirty after all.

With the last lines, the author became untraceable.
After reading this, I can probably say that it was only because of the lack of popularity of his blog that he managed to cross Indian borders alive. 

Wednesday, 8 January 2014

A goodbye is all that takes.

I was recently viewing one of my favourite blogs and I happened to pull up a light humour on the author of that blog, who in my opinion is a good person. But to my utter surprise, he toook an offense for it and said things he shouldn't have. Those things, although it was just a one line statement calling me a "dick", I would have brushed it aside like it never happened. But coming from a person I thought I knew, really hurts. I am having this kind of a problem everywhere, it seems. People, who I think I know, are giving me really some unexpected blows every now and then. I happened to have made some awesome friends with some girls and now we're not even talking anymore. And I was all fine by it. You don't want to talk to me, fine. I bid you goodbye and hope you have a happy life. This is my attitude. I don't like to keep any grudge nor am I having such a low self esteem that I will have to try and be dominating. But what hurt is that these things are not reciprocated. Those people back bitched about me and it really did hurt. Not by what they said but more by who said it. Because you never expect someone who was once so close to you, could ever say those things afterwards. I always thought there is even some dignity in rivalry. Well, atleast from the place I come from there definitely is.
 Life is all but an act of letting go. You meet people. You make friends with them. You lose them and you make some more in the journey of your life. But all this thing comes to the point of saying a dignified "goodbye" in the end. A symbol that makes you value the relationship you had, howsoever small it may have been. That the precious moments of my life I had spent with you were cherished and I will miss them. A "goodbye" that can minimise the pain of separation. I had a friend whom I could not say that to. And I will always feel guilty about it. Though our time together was short, but it was the most cherished time I had spent and has bore quite a mark on my heart. Just letting go of people respectfully and in a dignified manner makes us better people. People without grudges. People without hatred in their veins. Whenever life throws stones at you. you just cannot throw stones back at it. You just embrace yourself for it and try to keep moving forward. Same thing has to be with people. If someone hurts you bad, try not to hurt them back. They may think you're being weak, maybe that you even don't know how to hurt back but the truth is you don't want to hurt that person no matter what has happened between you two. This is the principle of my life. This principle is tested many times. Even I am looked down by others due to it. Ridiculed you might say. But your good deeds never go unrewarded. Like mine. I did lose quite a few friends this time around but I did make some too. And even amended things with one of my very old friend with whom I had a fallout about 3-4 years ago. Well, what can be the greater reward than that? And a greater proof that my attitude has been right and this principle really does work?
Finally, I would just say this- People will never behave according to your whims and fancies. You got to understand this. There might be some serious points of differences between you two and even some deeper issues about some person. But above all this, people are not bad from inside. A relationship has to be moulded by soft hands like a cotton candy gradually. You try and beat it with hammer, it will fall apart like it never existed. Even if that relationship is not working anymore, and it might be any kind of relationship, be it love interest or friendship or even with your family, if you have to let go of a person, let him or her go without any hatred or grudges in your heart. Our hearts are too pure for the blood mixed with hatred to be running in it. I didn't have any regrets in any of my relationships that have ended. And so there was no hatred nor any kind of remorse or anger. It had to happen someday, it's bad it happened so soon. A reciprocal feeling of respect and dignity might not come at that exact time but one would hope it would, in the future. And when it does, you will see that how much you have outgrown that person :)

Good night.