Wednesday 8 January 2014

A goodbye is all that takes.

I was recently viewing one of my favourite blogs and I happened to pull up a light humour on the author of that blog, who in my opinion is a good person. But to my utter surprise, he toook an offense for it and said things he shouldn't have. Those things, although it was just a one line statement calling me a "dick", I would have brushed it aside like it never happened. But coming from a person I thought I knew, really hurts. I am having this kind of a problem everywhere, it seems. People, who I think I know, are giving me really some unexpected blows every now and then. I happened to have made some awesome friends with some girls and now we're not even talking anymore. And I was all fine by it. You don't want to talk to me, fine. I bid you goodbye and hope you have a happy life. This is my attitude. I don't like to keep any grudge nor am I having such a low self esteem that I will have to try and be dominating. But what hurt is that these things are not reciprocated. Those people back bitched about me and it really did hurt. Not by what they said but more by who said it. Because you never expect someone who was once so close to you, could ever say those things afterwards. I always thought there is even some dignity in rivalry. Well, atleast from the place I come from there definitely is.
 Life is all but an act of letting go. You meet people. You make friends with them. You lose them and you make some more in the journey of your life. But all this thing comes to the point of saying a dignified "goodbye" in the end. A symbol that makes you value the relationship you had, howsoever small it may have been. That the precious moments of my life I had spent with you were cherished and I will miss them. A "goodbye" that can minimise the pain of separation. I had a friend whom I could not say that to. And I will always feel guilty about it. Though our time together was short, but it was the most cherished time I had spent and has bore quite a mark on my heart. Just letting go of people respectfully and in a dignified manner makes us better people. People without grudges. People without hatred in their veins. Whenever life throws stones at you. you just cannot throw stones back at it. You just embrace yourself for it and try to keep moving forward. Same thing has to be with people. If someone hurts you bad, try not to hurt them back. They may think you're being weak, maybe that you even don't know how to hurt back but the truth is you don't want to hurt that person no matter what has happened between you two. This is the principle of my life. This principle is tested many times. Even I am looked down by others due to it. Ridiculed you might say. But your good deeds never go unrewarded. Like mine. I did lose quite a few friends this time around but I did make some too. And even amended things with one of my very old friend with whom I had a fallout about 3-4 years ago. Well, what can be the greater reward than that? And a greater proof that my attitude has been right and this principle really does work?
Finally, I would just say this- People will never behave according to your whims and fancies. You got to understand this. There might be some serious points of differences between you two and even some deeper issues about some person. But above all this, people are not bad from inside. A relationship has to be moulded by soft hands like a cotton candy gradually. You try and beat it with hammer, it will fall apart like it never existed. Even if that relationship is not working anymore, and it might be any kind of relationship, be it love interest or friendship or even with your family, if you have to let go of a person, let him or her go without any hatred or grudges in your heart. Our hearts are too pure for the blood mixed with hatred to be running in it. I didn't have any regrets in any of my relationships that have ended. And so there was no hatred nor any kind of remorse or anger. It had to happen someday, it's bad it happened so soon. A reciprocal feeling of respect and dignity might not come at that exact time but one would hope it would, in the future. And when it does, you will see that how much you have outgrown that person :)

Good night.

IHY

6 comments:

  1. True chhotu. You suddenly sound so mature. As you grow older, there will be weirder happenings. There is no use of holding grudge against anyone. Each one is fighting their own battle.

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    1. Is it so di? I just thought maybe I need some grown up things every once in a while ;)
      And more weirder things?? >_<

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  2. I agree with what Pooja said above about you sounding very mature :) Reading the first few lines I didn't expect this post to turn the way that it did.

    I agree with you...people come and go, even friends, and it all still somehow pieces together and works out just fine. I guess it just shows how you don't really need someone else to live, of course you do need people, but those people can change.

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    1. Both you ladies ! Your compliments have made my day ! I am sure it were compliments, right? guys? guys? :D

      People and their activities make you go crazy, isn't it? Just a thought with today me being on a lighter mood..
      Anyways I am glad you agree with me :) I think your last line sums up my entire post just fine :)

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  3. Things are turning you into a more and more thoughtful person. Take it all in your stride and make sure that you never repeat a mistake. Also, remember that no matter how screwed up things might seem at the moment, they won't last forever.

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    1. But I don't want to be thoughtful person >_<

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